Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Rejected, or fighting stinkin thinkin

So I haven't officially been rejected from any schools yet. But of the nine schools I applied to, I had only received responses from three as of last night.

If is any indication, I am likely to be waitlisted at American University. It appears that their slots are currently full, as literally every person who reported hearing back from them in the last week received a "Waitlist" or a "Rejected" response.

Based on the numbers, and the fact that I really messed up my application, I am about 95% confident that I will not get into UVA.

And for the sheer fact that they were long shots to begin with, I am not holding out any hope for Columbia or Northwestern.

That leaves University of Minnesota, a school to which I have heretofor held no serious inclination to attend, and the University of Richmond, who may or may not let me in, but whose program inspires little excitement.

Compounding all of this is the fact that I waited until close to the deadline on nearly all of these schools, despite being warned emphatically by my guidebook that to do so would be to drastically reduce my odds. In my defense, I was waiting for most of that time on my letters (specifically one) of recommendation to come in. But that does not excuse the fact that I should have completed everything else way ahead of time, instead of sticking to my usual M.O. of procrastinating.

I feel mournful now, in the way that someone who has shot herself in the foot perhaps grieves for her departed big toe. This all could have been prevented with a little more self-discipline and foresight.

But then, what is "this all" that I should have worked to prevent? Getting the cold shoulder by several schools while being warmly accepted and encouraged by two of my favorites? Temple and Texas are nothing to shake a stick at, especially that Texas, for which I had begun to give up hope long before any letters had arrived.

And then again, there is that wonderful DBT mantra, "I did the best I could with what I had been given." My life was not devoted to law school for the entire past year, nor was I entirely certain that this is the path I wanted to take, even as I was applying. So, forgive me, self, if I was not throwing all of my weight and time and energy into law school applications in November or December. Come to think of it, I took my LSATs in December, so.

Okay, I could have gotten them in sooner. I probably should have stuck to my original plan of trying to have them all in by December. But given what I've done and where I've come, I can say I'm okay with what I've got. I just have to remember not to take it all personally (ahh... the fourth of the Four Agreements).

And besides, now I can share my first piece of law school advice for others to disregard, in their own time: Apply as early as you can, and don't wait for all your letters of recommendation to come in before you send in your application! (Yes, turns out you can do that.)

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